I'd like you all to know that this weekly post takes longer than a movie review to write. It takes longer than making fun of the Golden Globes red carpet looks. It takes forfreakingever. Why? Because it takes me all day to find someone with a truly distinctive face. I tried to make Anne Hathaway this week's distinctive face before realizing she looks strikingly similar to Emmy Rossum. Then I tried Demi Moore, but she looks like Jordana Brewster. Mila Kunis looks like Vanessa Hudgens, Zac Efron looks like a young Jared Leto, and then I was like, "oh What about Ashley Olson?" Before remembering she has a literal freaking twin. I figured this would be a quick and easy addition to this blog until I found out just how rare a distinctive face really is...
This week's Distinctive Face? Colin Farrell
It's like George Clooney and Enrique Iglesias had an Irish lovechild who looks
like he melts chocolate with his eyes
Ah Colin Farrell. Where to begin? Farrell is kind of like a Tom Hanks- he does Forrest Gump and then he does...Da Vinci Code. Colin here has been in some excellent films, and directed by the likes Oliver Stone, Joel Schumacher, Steven Spielberg, Woody Allen, and Peter Weir. He's been nominated over and over for Best Actor awards from pretty much everyone except the Academy, but also he was Bullseye in Daredevil. Yeah, remember that? NO! Ack don't recall it, it's too awful.
Here's to make you feel better and forget about that whole Daredevil business
Farrell broke into mainstream Hollywood in 2000's Tigerland, and has been working his way up to the big time ever since. True, his career has been spotted with "eh" moments, but overall he's established himself as a versatile, talented actor. Farrell usually takes on challenging, not-the-norm roles, often affecting an accent. He's been cast in supporting roles under Tom Cruise, Christian Bale, Kevin Spacey, but graduated to leading roles in recent years. His life in the spotlight has been characterized by scandals- a sex tape, a crazy stalker, drugs and alcohol threatened to derail his career until he got sober.
I pretty much just don't want to write another paragraph
so um...here is this picture, 'cause it, you know, says a
thousand words and stuff.
Best moment of his career so far? His role as a hitman with a heart in the dark comedy In Bruges. Think Boondock Saints meets a bit of Snatch. Check it. 'Cause it's amazing. His latest projects are London Boulevard with Keira Knightley, and The Way Back, which I've talked about before. Expect to see him later this year in the comedy Horrible Bosses, which stars kind of everyone, including the guy from the Old Spice commercials. Seriously.
Aw he has a nice smile too. Look,
Seriously, this is just so much better
than more words, right?
When the unconventional posters for The Social Network were released in conjunction with its dramatic, innovative trailer, the world knew this movie would be something else. Or maybe I'm just obsessed with trailers. No matter.
The Social Network is directed by David Fincher, who isn't really a household name despite the fact that he's directed films like Benjamin Button and Fight Club. Martin Scorcese, Steven Spielberg, James Cameron...they tend to make "bigger" films in the sense that they make a billion dollars. Fincher, on the other hand, is a little more selective; he's less prolific, and his films rarely ever graze the $100 million mark. But this guy knows what he's doing. After all, got Aaron Sorkin on board, who is one of the most beloved screenwriters I know of for his show, The West Wing, which ran for seven fast-talking seasons. If you know Kevin Smith, you know he's infamous for writing long-winded monologues for his characters. Sorkin is known for dialogue as well, but in a different way. He writes fast-paced give-and-take conversation like no other. Social Network is very much an idea that Sorkin was meant to write the words to. He captures Zuckerberg, Parker, the Winklevoss twins beautifully, and without any trepidation. Despite the fact that the media has downplayed the reality of the caricatures Sorkin created in comparison to the actual people, I beg to differ. Their souls are right there on film. Watch an interview with Zuckerberg, or Parker, and you'll recognize what Sorkin brought to the screen right there. I loved Sorkin's Zuckerberg, but his Winklevoss twins were spot on, and oh so humorous they stole every scene they were in.
The film stars Jesse Eisenberg, who has been on the rise the last couple of years seemingly out of nowhere. He's been around for maybe ten years, but in 2009 he did five films in the course of one year. Considering he's only done like 20 films, that's a quarter of his career in one year. That year's Adventureland and Zombieland put him in the big leagues, and he was soon acting alongside some of the biggest names in showbiz. Now he's starring in a film that he's been nabbing nominations for like crazy. He's expected to be announced as an Academy Award nomination for Best Actor later today.
"omg you guys, just hand over my Oscar already"
And this guy was born to deliver lines written by Aaron Sorkin, which is awesome. And if you haven't seen the movie yet, be prepared to get the creepy crawlies at the intensity of his cold staring black eyes as he bites his words from his mouth. Beautifully done.
Justin Timberlake has a major role as Sean Parker, the guy who invented Napster, and also a driving force behind why Facebook is the biggest, coolest thing ever these days. Andrew Garfield portrays Eduardo Savarin, Zuckerberg's financial partner when they started Facebook, whom Zuck eventually coldly cut out of the company. His strong performance may have contributed to his landing the new Spider-Man reboot movie (which I still have not formed opinions about). Armand Hammer, otherwise known as Armie Hammer, but come on, let's just call him by his name people, it's so much funnier, plays both Winklevoss twins. Which is also awesome.
Also he- er they. Er he. Look great in a suit.
The story of Facebook, as told by The Social Network, is a story of an insanely smart dude, someone who understands how people tick maybe better than he understands how he himself ticks. It's the dramatic story of friendship, of betrayal, and of a rise to a kind of fortune people don't even dream of because it's so impossible.
"Yeah, well, people always thought being this
gorgeous was too impossible to dream of too
but here I am"
Look, people have said that it's too dramatized, it's unfair to Zuck, it doesn't tell the whole story, or whatever. And yeah, Zuckerberg rented out a theater and took the whole company to see the movie when it came out, supposedly in a show of good humor and acceptance or something. Yeah I don't buy it. This guy is smart okay. He obviously can't decry the film, because it makes him look bad. Instead, support it, be kind, be cool. It's all about being cool. Then take the office to see it to demonstrate to them that you're awesome, you get movies made about you, you're cool, you're in charge, and you will screw them over if they mess with you. Sounds smart to me. YOU CAN'T FOOL ME ZUCKERBERG!
Now I'm gonna link this to Facebook.
Director: David Fincher
Rated: PG-13 for sexual content, drug and alcohol use, and language. IMDb page
Trailer:
I hereby nominate this photo for most awkward Red Carpet look.
Jane Krakowski. Ready to give birth, even at the Golden Globes.
This really is a wonderful dress, and a great color, but also she's pregnant. Did you see Natalie Portman's dress? Okay, it was simple, modest, very motherly, great color choice, and it looked great on her. But Jane Krakowski here is wearing four-inch heels which, unless she's on some crazy pain medications, are probably killing her back. The dress has also been tailored not just for a pregnant woman, but specifically for her pregnant belly, so it is cradled in some very tight fabric. What makes this dress the most awkward of the night is the slit up the side. Is that for easy access in case she goes into pre-term labor, because that's the only explanation I can think of.
First of all, let's talk fashion. We can discuss the actual awards after. Let me start off by saying that every other woman arriving on the red carpet looked like she was headed for a high school prom (Jenna Ushkowitz, Mila Jovovich, Julia Stiles, Kelly Osbourne, Piper Perabo, I'm talking to you). The actresses who weren't going to prom were wearing sleek silhouettes and gorgeous nudes, neutrals, and pretty pinks, and it looked like some of them even let their children dress them (Aw cute? Uh, no). Let's take a look at the 2011 Golden Globes fashion...
Clothing Confusion... That's what these had to be. Just a little mistake. One of those "it seemed like a good idea at the time" fashion oopses. Their make up is sweet and their hair is perfect, but the dress just kinda ruins it with its confused design.
Elizabeth Moss's green dress has a wonderful neckline, but it quickly becomes a mess of asymmetrical lines and random pleating. Jane Lynch's dress was too heavy, even tall as she is, and the texture is feathery one moment, and pleating the next, and then there's the belt and the awkward neck. Hope Davis' dress would have been gorgeous if its design weren't so schizo. Lace seems to have been assigned at random, but the silhouette is pretty.
Oh that's not that...mm okay, yeah it is...
Sometimes it's the little things that make or break a dress. It could be the fabric that just doesn't work, or the shape, or maybe your shoes are just weird. Even a flat hairstyle can take the air out of your outfit's sails (cough Olivia Wilde cough).
With Tina Fey's dress, there seems to be something awkward about the fabric, and something uncomfortable about its over-clinginess, and there's definitely something funky about those shoulder pleats. Jennifer Lopez's gown is downright gorgeous. She would have been on the best dressed list...if it weren't for that ridiculous cape. I don't know where to begin with Heidi Klum's dress. It doesn't seem to fit, the waist is bulky, and the material seems to drape in all the wrong ways.
Face Palm... You've been warned. What you are about to see may cause you to slap yourself compulsively and repetitively in the face. These ladies were going for an edgy look, but it seems they may have fallen off the edge and into a swamp of "aaaaaugh"
Gabourey Sidibe usually shows up on the red carpet dazzling in a perfect gown, but this seems to be the exception. This floral nightgown should have stayed at home. Julianne Moore. The color is loud, which is great, but the one long sleeve swooping up to grab the gold halter neck is just a little too..."what?" Halle Berry has been a red carpet glamour icon, but she seems to have lost her way in the mall and stumbled out of Victoria's Secret onto the red carpet. The bodice could have worked, but the sheer asymmetry and odd layering going on in the skirt spoils the look.
Queens of the Dress Mess... Somehow they were let out of the house looking like this. Why? We may never know.
January Jones's scarlet dress was sizzlin' hot. Except for the fringe going on at the bottom. And the fact that when I saw it I immediately thought of this scene from The Fifth Element when Mila Jovovich runs around scantily clad.
Can we talk about the fact that her shoes don't match? Also her dress seems to be coming FROM EVERYWHERE and it creates a four-foot radius of dress doom that no one wants to wander into. Also she's wearing sunglasses and appears to have fashioned her hair into a fuzzy hat.
I'll be the first to admit I've never been a fan of Tilda Swinton's minimalism, but I have always been intrigued by her red carpet looks. Until this. Everything about the cut is awkward- the material, the hem, the sleeves...please make it go away.
First of all, let's talk fashion. We can discuss the actual awards after. Let me start off by saying that every other woman arriving on the red carpet looked like she was headed for a high school prom (Jenna Ushkowitz, Mila Jovovich, Julia Stiles, Kelly Osbourne, Piper Perabo, I'm talking to you). The actresses who weren't going to prom were wearing sleek silhouettes and gorgeous nudes, neutrals, and pretty pinks, and it looked like some of them even let their children dress them (Aw cute? Uh, no). Let's take a look at the 2011 Golden Globes fashion...
Creams, Neutrals, and Nudes... Carrie Underwood, Julie Bowen, Michelle Williams, and Leighton Meester also looked smashing in their beige ensembles, and Helen Mirren dazzled in her golden gown, but these ladies take the cake for wearing their creams and neutrals best.
Anne Hathaway, Scarlett Johansson, and Sandra Bullock rocked the glitter and neutrals shades
Sarah Hyland, Kaley Cuoco, and Dianna Agron wore elegant designs with both fun textures and classic style.
Honorable Mentions for Best Gown... Nicole Kidman looked statuesque in her white column of a dress, and Mila Kunis wore a flattering jewel green gown; I've heard plenty about Angelina Jolie's matronly glittering dress, and Amy Adams' luxurious navy gown was lovely; Edie Falco's red dress was pretty, but not amazing; Kyra Sedgewick wore a flowing goldenrod gown; Glee's Naya Rivera nearly made the list, which would have put three Glee stars on the Honorable Mentions; but I have to say these ladies looked so phenomenal that they make the rest of the crowd of gowns look boring.
Eva Longoria's gown is exquisite, Amber Riley's is so glamorous, and Lea Michelle's pick in both color and design
is yet another hit for the young style icon.
Emma Stone's unexpected sleek and simple dress was very nearly the best dress on the red carpet. There's something about simplicity that's more elegant than all the ruffles in the world. Christina Hendricks provided the red carpet with some of her red bombshell allure; the hair, the silver accessories, the touch of modesty, all combined into a great look. Natalie Portman wore her baby bump with style in enchanting pink and red silk. Catherine Zeta Jones brought the glamour of Scarlett O'Hara, in a dramatic forest green gown that made her stand out in a crowd of slim designs.
Best Dress... Glee's Heather Morris wore the best gown of the evening. With a simple updo, and natural makeup, the young actress let her outfit do the talking. The strong silhouette, the creamy color, the simplicity of it make it the best dress of the evening, hands down.
Sometimes I see a movie poster and wonder what the design team was thinking when they put it together. Some posters just weren't meant for this time period, others seem to have worrisome double meanings, and still others are just sort of...off. Here are a few posters gone wrong.
This poster has several different, but equally disturbing messages. 1) This poor rabbit is on a conveyor belt, or maybe a shelf, of chocolate rabbits and is about to be eaten. He stands naively at ease waiting to die. 2) This rabbit has just cruelly and gleefully turned his fellow rabbits into chocolate statues that will now be eaten. Look at the fear in the eyes of those chocolate bunnies and tell me I'm wrong. That smug look on the real rabbit's face now looks a little sinister, now doesn't it? 3) This is an actual rabbit touching regular old chocolate bunnies in an assembly line. Let me remind you that rabbits carry a variety of terrible diseases that can be transmitted to humans, including rabies. Now think again how you feel about a rabbit touching food that children will soon eat. Yes. It's gross.
. I never really thought about it, but once I noticed it, now I can't stop noticing it. This has got to be the absolute most awkward pose they could possibly have picked. The poor girl is bent over, and stretching her neck to look up, as she stretches her arms down in holding flowers. Mostly she looks like she really needs to use the bathroom.
I don't need to explain this, right? It's the eyes. Aaaaaaaagh it's the eyes!
Star Trek. Waving the flag of gay pride in space.
This movie is coming out in 2011. It features an emotionally distant Mel Gibson carrying a beaver puppet around and using it to speak to people. Need I say more? Everything about this movie is absurdly hilarious.
Okay last one. This is the Grinch. On someone's roof in the dead of night. With no pants. Awkward. Also can I just mention that his dog is uh, looking up. Awkward.
