Sunday, May 20, 2007

The Unmissables Vol. IV

Prepare yourself for movies 31 through 40 of the Unmissables List.

The Matrix
The world is under the control of robots called Machines. Humans are slaves of the Machines, living in virtual reality created by the Machines. A computer hacker named Neo finds out the truth of his existence and joins a group of rebels in order to fight back against the Machine's regime.
Keanu Reeves, Carrie-Anne Moss, Hugo Weaving, and Laurence Fishburne.

Fight Club
A lonely insomniac is living his miserable existence, when he meets a soap salesman named Tyler Durden, and man with revolutionary ideas and a unique outlook on life. Together, they start a fight club, a way for men like them to vent their aggression. But something strange is at work and Tyler Durden may not be who he seems.
Brad Pitt, Edward Norton, and Helena Bonham Carter

Kill Bill Vol. I and II
When one woman breaks away from the group of assassins she belongs to, The Deadly Viper Assassination Squad, to settle down with the child still in her womb, she is marked for death. The rest of the squad and their leader, Bill, massacre the entire wedding party, killing everyone. Or so they thought. The bride lives on, and she's out for revenge. One of Quentin Taratino's best works, Kill Bill is a tribute to the karate movies of old and the suspense builds to the climax, until there's only one person left to kill-Bill.
Uma Thurman

Star Wars, the original trilogy
A long, long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away...lives Luke Skywalker, a young farmer boy who soon discovers he is one of the last remaining jedis. He must receive training from Jedi Masters, Obi Wan Kenobi, and Yoda, and he must face his nemesis- Darth Vader, the evil sith lord who wants to rule the galaxy- in order to fulfill his destiny and help the Rebel Alliance bring peace to the galaxy once more. On his adventures, Luke teams up with Han Solo, rugged pilot and scoundrel extraordinaire, and Princess Leia, leader of the resistance.
Mark Hammill, Harrison Ford, and Carrie Fischer

Monty Python and the Holy Grail
King Arthur sets off with the Knights of the Round Table to find the Holy Grail, the chalice that Christ drank out of during the Last Supper. They will face much danger, including a Black Knight who refuses to die, a killer rabbit, and some very unfriendly Frenchmen. Join King Arthur and the Knights of the Round Table on this hilarious adventure of British humour.
John Cleese, Eric Idle, Terry Gilliam, Terry Jones, and Michael Palin

Ferris Beuller's Day Off
Ferris Beuller is the guy everybody likes. But for once he's determined to have a day off from school. So he and his two friends skip school to have the time of their lives, despite the principal's threats and Beuller's sister's jealousy. Ferris Beuller's Day Off is a classic that no one should miss.
Matthew Broderick, Alan Ruck, Mia Sara, and Jeffrey Jones.

Princess Bride
Once Upon a Time there lived a farm girl named Buttercup whose servant boy, Wesley, fell in love with her and she with him. But he was forced to leave her and in his absence, Prince Humperdink took Buttercup to be his fiance. Wesley must face all dangers to find her again and win her back from the cruel Prince Humperdink. But he'll need a little help from his friends. Funny, and gallantly sweet.
Cary Elwes, Mandy Patinkin, Chris Sarandon, Andre the Giant and Robin Wright.

Ace Ventura
Ace Ventura, pet detective, is on the job, whether the case is missing dolphins or missing bats, no case is to small or too large for Ace Ventura. Jim Carrey at his best, no doubt about it, as Ace Ventura must face all odds to rescue those he loves-the animals.
Jim Carrey.

Four stories from four corners of the earth are mysteriously intertwined. Each story is told, each story is ordinary and epic. Ordinary lives, extraordinary people, inexplicable circumstances, the forces of chance and fate step in. In this large world we live in, if only we would listen more and try to understand the people around us. Babel is about this message.
Brad Pitt and Cate Blanchett.

Ever since he was hit over the head trying to save his wife as she was being raped and killed, Leonard has had one mission in life: to track down and kill the man who did it. The trouble is, Leonard is incapable of making new memories and everything he does he must remember by taking photos or making notes. It is impossible to tell who is good and who is evil in this twisting tale of revenge. You'll never see it coming.
Guy Pearce and Carrie-Anne Moss

Monday, May 7, 2007

Spider-Man 3

At last, after long anticipation, Spidey 3 finally made its appearance here in town on opening day. I arrived early with a group of friends and we were among the first to enter the theater. We were lucky. The line went down the block, apparently.

Warning: Spoilers may be ahead, read no further if you have not seen Spider-Man 3!

Sadly, after all the hype, after all the waiting, after all of the anticipation and guesswork, Spider-Man 3 just doesn't measure up. The movie is nearly three hours long, but the entire thing is crammed with way too much plot for just one movie. Sadly, this will mean yet another sequel. Most superhero movies focus on one, maybe two villains. This film takes on Peter's ego, Peter as Venom, Eddie Brock the evil photographer, Eddie Brock as Venom, Sandman (a completely pointless addition that adds nothing but more special effects), Harry as his father's sequel, M.J., and a conflicting love interest. All in all the sheer volume of storylines in this movie nearly rivals that of Pirates 2. And that's saying something.

Spider-Man 3 was predictable, and bordering on boring. There were pointless, unnecessary storylines like that of Sandman. He's a boring villain with nothing that sets him apart from other villains. He's your classic misunderstood, "I only became evil to help people" supervillain. For some reason, they also decided to throw in that oh, by the way *SPOILER!* He really killed Peter Parker's uncle, not the guy who's already dead. I mean, come on. Did we really have to go over all of this again? As if that's not enough, we have to waste a bunch more time having Peter dance around in the streets all emo.

There were far too many ridiculous scenes and silly "what the heck?" moments. Why does Peter's hair keep changing colors? Is there a reason for the eyeliner too? Why does Spider-Man save Bryce-Dallas Howard from the rampaging crane and then leave without having stopped the rampaging crane? Is the part with the waving flag really necessary?

This third Spidey movie will have to receive a sad, 2 1/2 stars out of five. Those stars are generous kudos to James Franco and the underlying story of the real Spidey- egotistical and a media whore. Interesting take. Also, Spidey does pull some pretty cool moves, and the special effects aren't half-bad.

Starring Tobey Maguire as Peter Parker, Kirsten Dunst as Mary-Jane, James Franco as Harry, Topher Grace as Eddie Brock/Venom, and Bryce-Dallas Howard as Gwen Stacy, Peter's Conflicting Love Interest. (Which by the way is a sad step down from The Village and Lady in the Water.)

Spidey isn't exactly unmissable. More of Unavoidable.


Find out which films to absolutely skip and which you can't miss. THese are my opinions on current films and timeless classics